False summit

I thought I'd made the money last night when the field had narrowed to 30, but soon discovered I'd have to outlast six more players. I was remembering the number of paid places from the session before. Thankfully, I did make the money, essentially by folding. My session winning streak improved to 5. I feel like I can't lose, which is often a bad sign :-)

style flavor buy_in  entry players entries paid place winnings

MTT   NLHE   174000  26000       6      97   24    22   337000

delta: $137,000
MTT NLHE balance: $24,065,768
2021 balance: $744,000
blue distance: $771,900
balance: $78,409,453

92o for the win

The most memorable hand of last night's session was one that I won with a holding of 92o (nine deuce offsuit). I flopped a stealth two pair and then extracted as much value from opponents as I could. I had an awesome showdown record for the tournament; at one point I was 8 for 8. I increased my session winning streak to 4. What's not to like? :-)

style flavor buy_in  entry players entries paid place winnings

MTT   NLHE   174000  26000       6     107   30    11   502000

delta: $302,000
MTT NLHE balance: $23,928,768
2021 balance: $607,000
blue distance: $908,900
balance: $78,272,453

Mini streak

Last night's in the money finish was my third straight. That qualifies as a mini streak. Is it a big deal? Considering my mediocre results earlier in the month, I'd have to say yes :-) The last time I had three winning sessions in a row was way back on December 18.

style flavor buy_in  entry players entries paid place winnings

MTT   NLHE   174000  26000       6      98   24    24   341000

delta: $141,000
MTT NLHE balance: $23,626,768
2021 balance: $305,000
blue distance: $1,210,900
balance: $77,970,453

Two significant disadvantages

Last night, I ran hot, made the money, and narrowly missed making the final table. I have nothing to complain about. Am I going to complain anyway? Yes :-) When the field was whittled down to seven players, I was in fourth place. So far, so good. However, I had two significant disadvantages:

1. the players in first and second were at my table

2. nobody else was

In a 6max tournament, when there are seven players left, there's nothing for it but to put four of them at one table and three at another. It's bad to be at the table with three players, since you get dinged by the blinds more often. It's worse to be at the table with three players up against the two biggest stacks, since they can play more loosely than you can. For both of these reasons, it would be fairest to have the tables periodically reshuffled, to spread the disadvantages around. Did that happen? No. Do I wish it had? Fervently.

style flavor buy_in  entry players entries paid place winnings

MTT   NLHE   174000  26000       6      67   18     7   606000

delta: $406,000
MTT NLHE balance: $23,485,768
2021 balance: $164,000
blue distance: $1,351,900
balance: $77,829,453

Waiting on a friend

"Waiting on a Friend" is one of my favorite Rolling Stones songs. I find it applicable to poker, one of my favorite games. A good hand is the friend all poker players wait on. Last night, my waiting was not in vain; two friends showed up. The first was pocket kings, aka cowboys. I won a big pot from an opponent who'd been dealt pocket queens. The second was a nut club flush, winning me another big pot. Those two hands gave me enough poker oxygen to make the money. It was just a min cash, but I'll take it :-)

style flavor buy_in  entry players entries paid place winnings

MTT   NLHE   174000  26000       6     101   24    22   351000

delta: $151,000
MTT NLHE balance: $23,079,768
2021 balance: $-242,000
blue distance: $1,757,900
balance: $77,423,453

Caboose Boy too early

Caboose Boy is my nickname for myself whenever I'm in last place in a tournament. I don't mind being Caboose Boy when I've already made the money or when the money bubble is about to burst. I do mind being Caboose Boy too early in a tournament, however, and that's what happened last night. I simply had too far to go with the chips I had, barring pure luck. About the only positive I can come up with is that I outlasted over half the field. Cold comfort :-)

style flavor buy_in  entry players entries paid place winnings

MTT   NLHE   174000  26000       6      77   21    38        0

delta: $-200,000
MTT NLHE balance: $22,928,768
2021 balance: $-393,000
blue distance: $1,908,900
balance: $77,272,453

The Big Lebowski

When I first added the Full Monty to my poker lexicon, I used it as a nickname for a straight flush. Later, I changed it to mean a session where I made a profit of at least one million play dollars. That meant straight flushes were in the market for a new moniker, but I never supplied one - until now. Allow me to present to you the Big Lebowski. Of course, I've appropriated it from a 1998 movie of that name by the Coen brothers. I've never actually seen the movie, but love the title. Last night, I flopped an open-ended Big Lebowski draw, and couldn't resist calling a sizable bet, even though the prudent play was to fold. Mirabile dictu, I hit it on the river. For the record, my draw was the five through the eight of diamonds, and the river was the nine. Yowza!

style flavor buy_in  entry players entries paid place winnings

MTT   NLHE   174000  26000       6      97   24    23   337000

delta: $137,000
MTT NLHE balance: $23,128,768
2021 balance: $-193,000
blue distance: $1,708,900
balance: $77,472,453

Another hand I hate

I've mentioned magic flushes, and how much I hate them, several times before. The magic flush has a near relation, and I hate it just as much. It's the magic straight. That's a hand where an opponent you have dominated hits a straight on the river, with four of the five cards coming from the board. Last night, I hit the rail when I was magic straighted. I was dealt an ace and a ten, and was up against an opponent who'd been dealt an ace and an eight. Result? Yet another 0th place :-(

style flavor buy_in  entry players entries paid place winnings

MTT   NLHE   174000  26000       6      31    9     -        0

delta: $-200,000
MTT NLHE balance: $22,991,768
2021 balance: $-330,000
blue distance: $1,845,900
balance: $77,335,453

Lion or lamb

When a tournament approaches the money bubble, every remaining player must decide if they want to play like a lion or play like a lamb. Lions are going for the money up top; lambs are just going for a min cash.

This is an excerpt from my July 20, 2020 post. Last night, I played like a lion. On my last hand, I was Caboose Boy on the money bubble. I was dealt the king and queen of spades, and flopped an open-ended straight draw. Both of my hole cards were overcards to the board. I got all my chips in the middle, but the turn and river were both blanks. In a New York minute, Caboose Boy became Bubble Boy. No regrets, though.

style flavor buy_in  entry players entries paid place winnings

MTT   NLHE   174000  26000       6      83   21    22        0

delta: $-200,000
MTT NLHE balance: $23,191,768
2021 balance: $-130,000
blue distance: $1,645,900
balance: $77,535,453

Polar bull

Actions made on the river are often polarizing. A polarizing action is a bet which could equally have been made by an opponent with a worthless hand and by an opponent with the nuts. When you respond to a polarizing action, you must decide for yourself whether your opponent has nothing, or everything. I've just come up with some terminology to distinguish your response. If you believe your opponent has everything, you should fold; in this case, you're a polar bear. If you believe your opponent has nothing, you should call; in this case, you're a polar bull. Not only are you bullish on your own hand, you believe your opponent's bet is bull(shit) :-) 

This is an excerpt from my February 9, 2017 post. Last night, my stack went on life support when a polar bull decision went south on me. The river put four cards to a straight on the board, but it was a gutshot. A big stack bet big on the river, and I just wasn't a believer. I fell in on the very next hand. I made a pair of sevens on the river, but got outkicked an opponent with an ace and a seven in his hand. Whatcha gonna do?

style flavor buy_in  entry players entries paid place winnings

MTT   NLHE   174000  26000       6      88   21    30        0

delta: $-200,000
MTT NLHE balance: $23,391,768
2021 balance: $70,000
blue distance: $1,445,900
balance: $77,735,453

Triple busted

It's a pretty rare thing to have three cards to a straight flush. It's considerably rarer to have four. That's the position I found myself in on the final hand of last night's session. I was dealt two cards to a straight flush, and two more showed up on the flop. I had two streets to make a straight, a flush, or a straight flush. None of the three draws panned out, so you could say I was triple busted. The silver lining? Although I hit the rail, and had started the hand as Caboose Boy on the bubble, someone at another table busted out before I did, allowing me to min cash.

style flavor buy_in  entry players entries paid place winnings

MTT   NLHE   174000  26000       6      76   21    21   290000 

delta: $90,000
MTT NLHE balance: $23,591,768
2021 balance: $270,000
blue distance: $1,245,900
balance: $77,935,453

How to lose a million in five easy lessons

The title of this post is tongue in cheek, of course. No one wants to take a course in how to lose money. For that matter, anyone who wants to lose money can easily do it, without need of instruction. I simply wanted to come up with a humorous way to summarize my last five sessions. Like clockwork, I lost $200,000 each time.

This is an excerpt from my July 8, 2020 post. It's my go to angle whenever I've been tossed off the train five times in a row. What I should have added is that only one lesson is needed to lose any amount you can think of, and even some you can't :-)

style flavor buy_in  entry players entries paid place winnings

MTT   NLHE   174000  26000       6      64   18    36        0

delta: $-200,000
MTT NLHE balance: $23,501,768
2021 balance: $180,000
blue distance: $1,335,900
balance: $77,845,453

Poxit

Last night's final hand inspired my latest neo neo - poxit. A poxit is what has befallen you when you were dealt a pocket pair, went all in with it, and hit the rail.

This is an excerpt from my August 5, 2019 post. Last night, I had another poxit, exiting the stage when my pocket nines lost to an opponent who had a king in his hand and hit a pair of kings on the river.

style flavor buy_in  entry players entries paid place winnings

MTT   NLHE   174000  26000       6      78   21    38        0

delta: $-200,000
MTT NLHE balance: $23,701,768
2021 balance: $380,000
blue distance: $1,135,900
balance: $78,045,453

Yet another 0th place

I hate getting a 0th place. I hate it even more when I get one with only a minute remaining in the late registration period. That's what happened in last night's session. My ace ten was dominated by an opponent's ace king. To add insult to injury, he paired his king on the river. I've now had five 0th places in the seventeen tournaments I've played so far in 2021. Pretty shabby.

style flavor buy_in  entry players entries paid place winnings

MTT   NLHE   174000  26000       6      78   21     -        0

delta: $-200,000
MTT NLHE balance: $23,901,768
2021 balance: $580,000
blue distance: $935,900
balance: $78,245,453

Porpoising

I first encountered the term "porpoising" in Michael Crichton's novel "Airframe"; he was referring to the phenomenon of an airplane rising and falling repeatedly, similar to a porpoise leaping in and out of the water. I (or more precisely, my stack :-) experienced this phenomenon in last night's session.

This is an excerpt from my April 8, 2010 post. My stack porpoised last night as well. That's frustrating. At first it was one step forward, one step back, but it degenerated to one step forward, two steps back. You know your days are numbered when it comes to that.

style flavor buy_in  entry players entries paid place winnings

MTT   NLHE   174000  26000       6      94   24    35        0

delta: $-200,000
MTT NLHE balance: $24,101,768
2021 balance: $780,000
blue distance: $735,900
balance: $78,445,453

Dereliction of duty

I came close to making the money last night. I don't know exactly how close, because I wasn't at the table when I hit the rail; I was web surfing instead. That was a dereliction of duty and a stupid thing to do, but there it is. That outcome touches on a behavior change in the PokerStars software I really hate - namely, that a player who falls in while sitting out is no longer allowed to go to showdown. I think every all in player should be allowed to go to showdown, whether he's at the table or not. There's a small but nonzero chance I would have made the money had the old behavior been in play.

style flavor buy_in  entry players entries paid place winnings

MTT   NLHE   174000  26000       6      84   21    23        0

delta: $-200,000
MTT NLHE balance: $24,301,768
2021 balance: $980,000
blue distance: $535,900
balance: $78,645,453

First Full Monty of the year

An unexpected bonus of taking the train before the midnight train is that it consistently attracts larger fields. That translates to bigger prize pools, and more money up top. Last night, I registered my first Full Monty of the year, by the skin of my teeth. For the first time, I made a profit of exactly one million play dollars. I was Caboose Boy for several stretches, but had an inkling early on that I was going to make the money. I just didn't know how much :-)

style flavor buy_in  entry players entries paid place winnings

MTT   NLHE   174000  26000       6     115   30     5  1200000

delta: $1,000,000
MTT NLHE balance: $24,501,768
2021 balance: $1,180,000
blue distance: $335,900
balance: $78,845,453

Wagering like clockwork

I spend more time than I should looking at extrapolated numbers. It doesn't make much sense to look at them early in the year, since that's when they fluctuate the most. Here are the first twelve profit extrapolations of the year:

2021-01-01 -73000000.000000
2021-01-02 -73000000.000000
2021-01-03 63266666.666667
2021-01-04 63875000.000000
2021-01-05 36500000.000000
2021-01-06 18250000.000000
2021-01-07 29877857.142857
2021-01-08 37001875.000000
2021-01-09 24779444.444444
2021-01-11 7001363.636364
2021-01-12 11558333.333333
2021-01-13 5053846.153846

In sharp contrast, here are the first twelve wagered extrapolations of the year:

2021-01-01 73000000.000000
2021-01-02 73000000.000000
2021-01-03 73000000.000000
2021-01-04 73000000.000000
2021-01-05 73000000.000000
2021-01-06 73000000.000000
2021-01-07 73000000.000000
2021-01-08 73000000.000000
2021-01-09 73000000.000000
2021-01-11 73000000.000000
2021-01-12 73000000.000000
2021-01-13 73000000.000000

I'm wagering like clockwork :-)

style flavor buy_in  entry players entries paid place winnings

MTT   NLHE   174000  26000       6     118   30    41        0

delta: $-200,000
MTT NLHE balance: $23,501,768
2021 balance: $180,000
blue distance: $1,335,900
balance: $77,845,453

Saved by a hammerwalk

I don't think I've talked about walks before, so let me remedy that. A walk is when you win a hand without having to make a single poker decision. As it turns out, there's only one way this can happen. You must be in the big blind, and everyone must fold around to you, including the small blind. You end up winning the antes and the small blind. Walks are quite rare, since the small blind is almost always getting the right price to call. Last night, I got a walk when I really needed one, being severely short-stacked. I'm dubbing it a hammerwalk, since I had a hammer at the time. A hammer is actually the weakest starting hand in hold'em, seven deuce offsuit. It's named that in irony. Getting a walk when you have a hammer almost feels like cheating :-)

style flavor buy_in  entry players entries paid place winnings

MTT   NLHE   174000  26000       6      85   21    16   369000

delta: $169,000
MTT NLHE balance: $23,701,768
2021 balance: $380,000
blue distance: $1,135,900
balance: $78,045,453

Earlier trains

Even though I've made a ton of money on the midnight train, I've decided to take it less frequently in the future. Instead, I'm going to take earlier trains on nights when I have work the following day. I initiated this change last night. The good news, in general:

1. there are multiple earlier trains which have the same buy in as the midnight train, and are 6-max like the midnight train

2. these earlier trains seem to attract fields as large as those of the midnight train

The bad news, in specific:

1. I took two trains last night, and got thrown off both

2. what got me thrown off the second one was a three outer hit by an opponent I had dominated

style flavor buy_in  entry players entries paid place winnings

MTT   NLHE   174000  26000       6     109   30    57        0
MTT   NLHE   174000  26000       6      22    7     -        0

delta: $-400,000
MTT NLHE balance: $23,532,768
2021 balance: $211,000
blue distance: $1,304,900
balance: $77,876,453

The land of the fours

On Saturday night, I eventually became Caboose Boy, but couldn't hold on long enough to make the money. So far this year, I've made the money four times in nine tries, for a percentage of 44.4444... In other words, the land of the fours :-)

style flavor buy_in  entry players entries paid place winnings

MTT   NLHE   174000  26000       6      89   21    35        0

delta: $-200,000
MTT NLHE balance: $23,932,768
2021 balance: $611,000
blue distance: $904,900
balance: $78,276,453

The iron-clad lily pad

I shouldn't have made the money last night. On one hand, I was all in and a big underdog. The PokerStars client showed that I had just a 20% chance of winning after the turn. My holding was ATo (ace ten offsuit), the river came a ten, and I improbably survived. I felt like a frog who'd jumped onto an iron-clad lily pad :-)

style flavor buy_in  entry players entries paid place winnings

MTT   NLHE   174000  26000       6      90   21    13   438000

delta: $238,000
MTT NLHE balance: $24,132,768
2021 balance: $811,000
blue distance: $704,900
balance: $78,476,453

A rash of quads

The night before last, I hit quad threes on one hand. Last night, I hit quad kings on another. Since quads are so rare, two in two sessions qualifies as a veritable rash of quads :-)

style flavor buy_in  entry players entries paid place winnings

MTT   NLHE   174000  26000       6      85   21    12   473000

delta: $273,000
MTT NLHE balance: $23,894,768
2021 balance: $573,000
blue distance: $942,900
balance: $78,238,453

The midnight train train

So far this year, I haven't missed a night of playing poker. That means my extrapolated number of sessions is a perfect 365. Moreover, the midnight train has made an appearance every night, so my extrapolated wagered amount is 73 million play dollars. You could say I'm on the midnight train train :-)

style flavor buy_in  entry players entries paid place winnings

MTT   NLHE   174000  26000       6      86   21    29        0

delta: $-200,000
MTT NLHE balance: $23,621,768
2021 balance: $300,000
blue distance: $1,215,900
balance: $77,965,453

tptko

Last night's session ended on a slickout; in other words, on a hand where I'd been dealt a big slick (an ace and a king). I paired my ace on the flop, giving me top pair and top kicker. I lost to an opponent who'd been dealt an ace and a six, and paired both on the flop. My latest neo neo? tptko, which stands for top pair top kicker out.

style flavor buy_in  entry players entries paid place winnings

MTT   NLHE   174000  26000       6      41   10     -        0

delta: $-200,000
MTT NLHE balance: $23,821,768
2021 balance: $500,000
blue distance: $1,015,900
balance: $78,165,453

Second timeliest tournament hand ever

The best hand you can receive in hold'em is pocket aces, and the best time to receive them is when you're in the big blind. No one will credit you with having them. It's even better when your tournament life is at stake. Getting rockets in that situation, when you so desperately need them, is like being saved by the cavalry. Last night, in the second MTT-R NLHE I played, I got rockets when in dire straights; I was in the big blind as the short stack, and the ante plus the big blind put me all in.

This is an excerpt from my January 4, 2108 post, which I titled "Timeliest tournament hand ever". Last night I had my second timeliest. Once again, I was short stacked. Once again, I received rockets. Once again, I got a much-needed chip infusion. The only differences? 1. I wasn't in the big blind. 2. I didn't fall in.

style flavor buy_in  entry players entries paid place winnings

MTT   NLHE   174000  26000       6      78   21    13   380000

delta: $180,000
MTT NLHE balance: $24,021,768
2021 balance: $700,000
blue distance: $815,900
balance: $78,365,453

Under the lights

Last night, I recorded my first Partial Monty of the year, missing out on a Full Monty by a single place. That carved a healthy chunk off my blue distance and put me in the black for 2021. Two things stand out about the session:

1. I had a set of sevens again, but had to release them without going to showdown

2. I was receiving an ace as one of my hole cards quite regularly :-)

style flavor buy_in  entry players entries paid place winnings

MTT   NLHE   174000  26000       6      57   15     3  1120000

delta: $920,000
MTT NLHE balance: $23,841,768
2021 balance: $520,000
blue distance: $995,900
balance: $78,185,453

S.O.S.: A.G.B.

The title of this post is my latest neo neo; it stands for "Set Over Set: Always Going Broke". What that means is that whenever I have a set and the only hand which can beat me is a better set, I'm never backing down. That's what I ran into last night on the final hand of the session; my set of sevens lost to a set of tens. For the record, both sets were hit on the flop. It was my second 0th place in a row, but as they say in French, "Je ne regrette rien" :-)

style flavor buy_in  entry players entries paid place winnings

MTT   NLHE   174000  26000       6      50   15     -        0

delta: $-200,000
MTT NLHE balance: $22,921,768
2021 balance: $-400,000
blue distance: $1,915,900
balance: $77,265,453

A silly extrapolation

Last night's session was my first of 2021. I failed to make the money. What's worse, I failed to outlast the late registration period of the tournament, so I started the year with a 0th place. If I calculate my extrapolated profit for the year based on this one session, which is admittedly a monumentally silly thing to do, it comes out to a loss of 73 million play dollars. Yowza! The good news is, that's not going to happen, and even if it did, my career balance would still be in the black.

style flavor buy_in  entry players entries paid place winnings

MTT   NLHE   174000  26000       6     117   30     -        0

delta: $-200,000
MTT NLHE balance: $23,121,768
2021 balance: $-200,000
blue distance: $1,715,900
balance: $77,465,453

You just can't make this shit up

On the final hand of my final session of the year, something happened that I'd never witnessed before in my entire poker career, which spans more than twelve years. I was dealt the deuce and trey of spades, and flopped a flush. That's not the rare part yet. When all my chips got into the middle, my opponent turned over a better flush. That's still not the rare part. The turn and river were also spades. That's the rare part. There were nine cards face up on the felt, and every single one of them was a spade. You just can't make this shit up :-)

style flavor buy_in  entry players entries paid place winnings

MTT   NLHE   174000  26000       6      88   21    23        0

delta: $-200,000
MTT NLHE balance: $23,321,768
2020 balance: $15,857,443
blue distance: $1,515,900
balance: $77,665,453